July 26
晚上1点半起来的时候，觉得睡不着
就开始画画，画到3点钟
睡着了
五点十五分醒来，去街上买了牛奶和黄瓜
开始煮我的清凉夏牛奶西米露
煮开水，丢入黄豆大小的西米（这西米是不是太大了点？）
换水继续煮
换水继续煮
开始读我的英语课文
N次被打断
放入牛奶，小小的玻璃珠子在牛奶中挤来挤去
大声喧哗
哎呀，好多牛奶啊
伙伴们，我们来游泳吧！
白白的牛奶开始冒泡泡
噗~啪~噗~啪
大家开始玩起来
一个小时后，大家都躲进罐子里开始休息
小花带着它们进了公司
在凉凉的空气里
品尝着自己的成果
杯子里放上两片柠檬
滑进2颗冰糖
其实
这样也不错
笑
July 23
每天坚持发一条短消息
有时候会是两条
幸运的话会是三条以上
不超过四条
因为不是搓麻将
通常没有回音
有时会有一条
幸运的话会是两条以上
不会超过四条
因为不是搓麻将
就像在买彩票
不去期待巨额回报
小小的回复是个快乐的惊喜
不去想那些遥远的承诺
每天按着自己的步骤
一步一步
接近每天的生活
也许会是个让人意外的结果
但通常没有意外
因为不是搓麻将
因为我不会搓麻将
July 19
| 【北 岛 简 介】《英文版》
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北岛与中国新诗
BEI DAO AND MODERN CHINESE POETRY
Modern Chinese poetry, which is written in vernacular Chinese rather than classical Chinese, became a literary genre only after the May Fourth Movement in 1919. Almost 80 years later, this genre has now matured in the sense that it has an agreed form of free form, and rules of no rules. Just like contemporary poetry in all societies, modern Chinese poetry is only appreciated by a handful of genuine literature aficionados. Yet, despite of the limited audience, there is never a shortage of poets on either side of the Taiwan Strait.
In fact, poets in mainland China, just as avant-garde artists there, often pose political problems for the authorities. The free spirit and iconoclastic vision that one finds in the works of a true poet inevitably clash with the intolerant and dogmatic control of the Chinese Communists. Some poets' works were banned, their movement closely watched. For example, in October 1990, poets from Beijing, Nanjing, Shanghai, and Hangzhou traveled to Mt. Huang (in Anhui province) for an independent literary journey. Even though there was nothing political about this gathering, the authorities still kept an eye on it, and termed it "the Mt. Huang Incident." (The source of this information is a Chinese literary journal published in Cambridge, MA., called Qingxiang [Tendency]. At the back of every issue, "Tendency" includes a list of underground literary journals in China, as well as a chronology of recent happenings in the artistic world there - both of which are not to be found elsewhere. The magazine is supposedly a quarterly; however, due to the shortage of funding, it now has a very precarious existence. The editor is Bei Ling.)
After June 4th, 1989, some of the top poets went into exile in Western countries. The most famous of them all is Bei Dao (literally, "northern island"), whose real name is ZHAO Zhenkai. In 1994, Bei Dao tried to return to Beijing to visit his family, but was held in detention at the Beijing airport. For hours the authorities questioned him about the associations between his literary magazine "Today" and the overseas branch of the democratic movement. Afterwards, he was deported back to the U.S., where he currently resides. Bei Dao never got a chance to see his family, who were all waiting for him at the airport.
Bei Dao has been considered a hopeful for the Nobel literary award nominee - the only Chinese writer who has acquired such worldwide attention at this point. For the poet, however, this attention has been a burden. Every year when the time comes for the announcement of the Nobel literary award, Bei Dao stops answering the phone in order to maintain some peace and quiet.
A fine poet he definitely is, but Bei Dao is not necessarily the greatest of contemporary Chinese writers. As a matter of fact, not a single Chinese writer can claim this status. The fact that Bei Dao is the only one under the spotlight is really a result of the West's general disinterest in the Chinese literary world. Many good writers on both sides of the Strait have been ignored.
Nevertheless, Bei Dao's poetry is definitely worth reading. His concerns are grand - fatherland, civilization, history , and the alienation from all these are the constant subjects of his poetic imagination. His controlled emotion is expressed through sentences that are simple syntactically, but extraordinarily imaginative in terms of diction. The exact meanings of his poems are difficult to pinpoint, and yet, it is the overall beauty of the allusions that touches the heart. As the poet himself would recommend, try not to read Bei Dao's poems as those written by a dissident or the greatest poet from China, but just by a poet, an artist of language | |
The Answer
-- written by Bei Dao
Baseness is the secret knock of the base
Integrity the epitaph of the noble
Look how the gilded sky drifts full of
The inverted crooked reflections of the dead
The ice age has past,
So why are there icicles everywhere?
The Cape of Good Hope has been discovered
Why do a thousand sails contend for the Dead Sea?
I came into this world
Carrying only paper, rope, a silhouette
To speak aloud before the trial
A voice that has already been judged
I tell you, world
I—do—not—believe!
If a thousand challengers lie trampled beneath your feet
Count me as number one thousand and one.
I don't believe the sky is blue
I don't believe in thunder's echoes
I don't believe that dreams are false
I don't believe in death without retribution
If the sea is destined to breach the dykes
Let all the water of bitterness flow into my heart
If the land is destined to rise up
Let humanity choose a new summit for existence again.
A new turning point and flickering stars
Embroidered now across the unobstructed heavens
These are the pictographs of five thousand years
These are the staring eyes of future generations.
July 18
我有点忐忑，心中有点乱
我跨了一步，而我现在有点想收回这一步
我们总是自以为能一切都顺利
可是你能告诉我，这到底是什么样的一个情况
人如果不能坦白，还有什么是正确的
I told myself to insist on what I wanted
But I'm afraid now.
Hey, guys, tell me what to do
tell me how to do
I dislike the situation like this
Again it happened
How life will be this
I was scared.
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